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Writer's pictureKiki Judith

How to win likes, approval, and Opportunities in 2020



Have you ever wondered why you aren't as successful, as pretty, as smart, as popular, or as talented as the person next to you? If your answer's yes, then have I got the perfect solution for you. All you need to do is follow these simple steps to become the person of your dreams. It really is that easy!


Please, stop believing this whenever you hear it. It is so tempting to accept this sentiment, but that's all it is. There is no perfect answer. If you read about something as big as winning everything you want in life being easy or simple, that should be a major red flag.


STEP 1


If you're unsure of what you want to do with your life or who you want to be in life, you need to decide on something now. I'll give you five seconds. 5. 4. 3. 2. 1. Great! I hope you knew you could never change this answer when you responded.

Identify who is succeeding and who you admire doing what you want to do. For example, if I want to be famous, I might look at Taylor Swift. She is a perfect example of a famous woman.


I hope this dramatization is beginning to make my point sink in. It really is okay not to know what you want to do with your life, regardless of your anxieties and people informing you on what you should do. Seriously. Even if you do successfully choose what you want to do, let me warn you, things won't always go to plan. Mistakes get made, situations change, passions shift. There's nothing wrong with having new ideas and new desires. That's part of changing and growing as a human being.


STEP 2


Whoever you just thought of, it's time to compare yourself to them. Some people may advise you to stop comparing yourself to others but we all know we're still going to do it, anyways. That's why it's actually the very first step to gaining more people's approval. Don't let yourself feel overwhelmed or stressed by all of the things you have been doing wrong. 2020 is the year for you to change that. Write down a list of all of the differences between you and the people you want to be. You should immediately do everything on that list to become indistinguishable from them. For example, the difference between me and Taylor Swift is that she's famous. Since that's what I want to be and that's the difference, then that's what I become. In a blink of an eye, I'm now famous, well, acting like I am.

Are you all done? Perfect!


Hahahaha. Not even close. I can't just wish myself to be famous. Not only is that a terrible life purpose for me to have, but it also takes most people years to achieve the level of fame Taylor Swift has.

Winning someone's approval does involve comparing yourself to them and becoming more similar. The purpose of comparison is to understand ourselves and our place in the world according to the Social Comparison Theory. When we look at other people who are in some way "better" than us, we may begin to feel envious and have lower self-esteem. Because of social media, we can compare ourselves to people who have everything we want all of the time! No wonder we're starting to see more negative effects of social media. We're all struggling to protect ourselves against comparison, which is for the most part automatic. That's why it doesn't logically make sense to desire other people's approvals. It will almost always involve making self-sacrifices. Somehow, it seems to be something we always want.

The reason why I said comparison is for the most part automatic is because it doesn't have to be. If one is completely satisfied by and confident in their work or their standing, there is no need to compare. How do we get there? That's the million-dollar question, not, "How do we win approval?".


STEP 3


Now that you act like everyone else who inspires you, you need to look like them, too. This way you'll be taken seriously in what you want to do with your life. Do they have blue eyes? Wear colored contacts! Do they weigh less than you do? Stop eating. Do they have more expensive clothes? Buy them all. To look more like Taylor Swift, I had to spend thousands of dollars on surgery to break my legs and get titanium rods placed in them. Why? To be as tall as she is, silly! I also had to dye my hair, get plastic surgery to change my body shape, buy colored contacts, change my wardrobe, and learn how to write pop music. It honestly didn't take that long. I think we all have the money to accomplish this very easily. In total, I only spent $1,500,41.01 (& I saved $59.99!). It was such a great deal.


This step is where many of our minds naturally skip to.

We associate someone's success and opportunities with how they look instead of how hard they worked to achieve it.

Although looking a certain way and being wealthy, will help someone gain opportunities it doesn't mean they will continue to receive those opportunities or receive genuine support if they do. If there is anything I have learned in my life, it is that there is rarely only one right way to do something. To explain, I want to talk about my education. I've been to at least five schools, private, part-time homeschooled and public. I've taken traditional classes, online classes, honors classes, IB classes, dual-enrolled classes, and AP classes. I only took high school courses in my last year of middle school instead of skipping a grade. I began having half-days last year. I wanted to graduate a year early and take a traditional gap year. Instead, I graduated this semester and am moving to live and volunteer with family abroad for a couple of months. Nothing about what I've done has been the expected way to complete one's education but I am still receiving my high school diploma with a 4.0 GPA like everyone else who stays in school. I didn't have my education handed to me because of my money or because of the way I look. I worked my ass off for it and I couldn't be any prouder.


STEP 4


In my quest to be famous, I nearly forgot that I have a variety of health, family, and general life problems. I've always been told, "mind over matter." Just in case you don't know, this means that if you think about something, you can beat it no matter what. So I thought about my health problems and informed them that they couldn't continue to impact my life. Guess what? All of my health issues went away! This mind over matter philosophy is so easy to follow that anyone, even you, can do it! It's obvious that Taylor Swift doesn't have any problems, struggles, or challenges in her life so I can't either.


There are certain facts of life that you can't change no matter how hard you try to or want them to change. This doesn't mean you can't do what you want to. You may just have to do things a little differently. It may be more difficult but dreams (the things that really matter) are worth the work, no matter how challenging.


STEP 5


Once you've put everything together, you'll have everything you want in life. Including the surgeries, it only took me five minutes to accomplish this. I know that sounds impossible to you and highly unlikely, but I promise it will only take you five minutes to be exactly who you should be to get everyone's approval and to accomplish your dreams if you follow these five steps.


This isn't even a step. I just thought it would be more aesthetically pleasing for the step-by-step guide to have five steps.


The Truth


I wish success was this easy to come by. Many people have tried to follow these steps to get what they want but I've learned that you'll lose every time you try to be someone else and still try to get what you want. I've learned that you can't magically change what you look like or what problems you do or don't have, that faking it 'til you make it can be exhausting, too, and that if you're like me, your dreams won't be handed to you on a silver platter. It takes time to achieve everything you want to in life, not five minutes. I'm sure you already knew this when you first started reading this blog post, though.


So many people say this and don't mean it. That's why I want you to pretend you've never heard this before. You can win likes by paying for them or by looking a certain way. Do the likes matter if they're not real and if you're not real? You can easily win people's surface-level approval by becoming someone else (and let me tell you that takes so much more energy to be someone else). Does approval matter if you aren't actually yourself? Does it really matter if you don't recognize yourself? And, you can win opportunities by playing by the rules of the game. But, do the opportunities even matter if they're not the opportunities you want? Don't you get it? The secret is that likes and approval and opportunities don't even matter if you and the people around you are not authentic. Read that again for the people in the back! Being authentic doesn't mean throwing the word around on your blog or slapping it on some of your products. It looks like writing about what you're interested in regardless of the engagement stats or risking losing a couple of followers. It is so freeing to be yourself. Taking the leap to be authentic is scary but it is so worth it. If you don't feel convinced by now, I'm sorry but I can't give you the perfect way to go from pretending to be someone else to being yourself. It's just a leap of faith and as cheesy as it sounds you will be ready to jump when you're ready.


No matter where you are in this journey, I can tell you that winning likes, approval, and opportunities is unimportant. In the whole scheme of things, your value isn't determined by your popularity and accomplishments. I know, easier said than done. Life is hard enough as it is. Wasting time trying to win likes, approval, and opportunities only makes it harder. As one of my friends kindly said, though, "The hurting is part of what makes life so beautiful."


Conclusion

Thank you so much for reading! Don't forget to like and share this article if you found it to be helpful! I know you did!!

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